This is a practice from my latest book: “Leap Before You Look.” This practice is chosen from the section “Feeling Practices.”
For this practice,
You will need to make a compilation
Of many different kinds of music.
Make a playlist on your iPod or computer.
Find some music that is soft and soothing,
Some which is angry and defiant.
Find some that has a strong vibrant beat of sexual energy,
And some which is soft and devotional.
Find music to evoke every kind of feeling:
Grief, longing, rage, joy, passion, and resentment.
Your compilation should be about 30 to 45 minutes altogether.
Now, go to your room, switch off the phone, make sure you are undisturbed,
Play the music.
Enter into each of these feelings one by one.
You can dance, you can cry, you can call out in longing.
Use your whole body to express each feeling.
Let the music guide you into each wave of feeling,
Free of any reason why.
When it is finished, lie down for several minutes and feel your body.
This is a quintessentially feminine practice. The feminine in all of us wants to feel without any restriction. It does not matter to the feminine heart if the feeling is so-called positive or negative, just the freedom to feel is enough. Anything fully felt without limits, for the feminine, is an easy portal back to the divine, back to love.
For millennia, the feminine has been dominated by the masculine’s love of reason and logic. If you are sad, there must be a reason. If you are angry, there is something outside that made you so, and the solution is to find it and change it or fix it. As a result, we have been conditioned to always have a story, a reason for why we feel as we do.
Stories about why we think we have feelings turn them into soap operas and rob us of the possibility to feel them completely. When we are convinced that we know why we feel a certain way, then we become emotional and reactive. Now, I am angry with you because of what you did, and I want an apology and an explanation and possibly revenge. All our energy goes into action and manipulation, and there is very little left for just feeling.
When we are really honest and pay careful attention to the fabric of our experience, we never really know for sure why we feel as we do. It is all made up. Am I really angry because of what he said, or was it the driver who cut me off an hour before? Was it the cheap wine I had with dinner last night, or was it a memory from childhood, or even a past life? We never really know for sure. Most of the time, if we can be really honest with ourselves, we can see that we already had the feeling before the event that we think caused it. We were angry before the insult, we were down before the rejection, we were giggly before the joke. It may well be the feeling which already existed that lassos that experience to us, gave rise to what we end up seeing as the cause.
This practice is an invitation to the feminine heart, in all of us, to feel what arises free of any reason or story. It liberates feeling from the soap opera of why and because. You can do this practice alone, or sometimes a few people will get together and do this practice as a group. It takes longer than many of the other practices in this book, so you might not be able to do this every day. But just once a week will restore the capacity in you to feel unencumbered by logic, and this will overflow naturally into the rest of your life.
You can discover 72 practices like this in Leap Before You Look. Buy it now from our new online store at a discounted price.